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Home of irreverent Madness
Mince Pie Of Doom
Join Holly Noel and the gang as they take on their toughest Christmas challenge yet...
The Sprout of Destiny!
The Final Chapter of The Mince Pie of Doom! Saga,

So it’s bye bye to the last slice of pie, now our Holly is all jolly but the jokes have run dry.

It’s Christmas eve and Holly Noel is in his usual grumpy mood, only this time there is no Ginny Pinny to cheer him up. Worse still news reaches Holly that Ginny has gone to the great cleaning cupboard in the sky - surely not!

Ginny returns to Holly in a dream, and announces three visits from the spirits of cases past. present and to come. Despite the protestations of plagiarism by a Mr. C Dickens the spirits do appear in the form of Fred Bear (Cases past - in the 1970s to be precise), Herr Nick (Cases Present) and Auntie Freeze accompanied by her new partner and jail breaker (and actually the mastermind behind this cunning plan) Krampus - look him up in Austrian mythology if you want to know more - as the spirits of cases yet to come.

The spirits show that throughout time Holly has had to cope with a rival private detective, Dirk Fantastic, who apart from stealing all the girls also reveals that Holly has not been that thorough in some of his cases and this has led to wrongful convictions and ultimately the decline of Holly Noels Detective Bureau. Add to that the revelling in his downfall of Sergeant Carrion of West Mercia Police, assisted by his sidekick and ultimately lover Constable Haywain, things look bleak for Holly - especially as Auntie Freeze is in fact trying to get him to eat her latest maniacal morsel, the Sprout of Destiny.

Finally, at his lowest point he is offered a way out, a way to walk away from all his troubles. It is at that point that Holly makes a noble decision. He will fight on to save his Bureau, to honour the memory of Ginny Pinny and to overcome all obstacles to get Ruby Tuesday back - and to prove he means business he determines to do something he has never done before and vowed he would never do, he eats a Brussels Sprout; unwittingly the Sprout of Destiny as at happens. Oops, Auntie Freeze has won, she has finally defeated Holly Noel and the path to destroying Christmas once and for all is clear.

Or is it, Krampus reveals that the Sprout of Destiny, rather than being the means to the end of Holly Noel, is in fact a test of his character, his determination to turn over a new leaf and to do the right thing at last, including defending Christmas. To make matters worse Krampus reveals that he is actually Father Christmas, a Father Christmas who is coming to the end of his 1000 year term of office. By eating the Sprout of Destiny Holly has shown himself worthy of picking up the mantle of Santa Clause for the next 1000 years. Despite his original protestations against the idea, when he discovers that Ruby will be with him to help, and a not actually dead Ginny Pinny as well, he agrees to do it. In frustration at being thwarted once again, Auntie Freeze storms off, accidentally missing the door out and ending up in a cupboard full of stolen kittens (don’t ask - this is a precis) thus facing her greatest fear and reverting to her true identity of Lindy Anne Summer who has no desire to bring Christmas to an end.

And so,they all live happily ever after... Or do they?